That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
