From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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