Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
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I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
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Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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