everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
it's like heaven, but drunker
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
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