and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
