the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Is it penis luge time yet?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize