its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
