He is such a slut. More and more my type.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
