4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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