I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize