I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Never underestimate the power of titties
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize