you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
