Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
