i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize