So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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