...so i touched it.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Randomize
