he told me I talked like a deaf person
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
