At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
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I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
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I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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