Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
