make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
