Tell her she can't have a vagina
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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