I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
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Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
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I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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