so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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