She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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