HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
