Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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