i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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