Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
