I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
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the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
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We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam