OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
29 People Who Do Dirty Things Just To Get Their Way
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So much rum. So many feels.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"