Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize
