It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize