I hate all girls vehemently.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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