I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I will be naked everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Randomize