That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
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