she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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