i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
