I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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