I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
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