New invention idea: vibrating tampons
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park