good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.