Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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