it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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