fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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