We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT