his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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