I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
