East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
