But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He told me they were just razor bumps!
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
