i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize