the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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