So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
