the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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